Advice on very simple project for newbie please.

I don't really want to have to learn a lot about the technology ...

...

GRSP:
Yes they are grumpy, critical and superior. Just the sort of responses that drives people away - maybe that's what they want though - leave them alone in their little club??

Yes, good idea. Go to a forum where they are prepared to help people who aren't prepared to learn anything. Wherever that is.