Ok, here is somethig you can do.
But first i'll issue a warning.
Keep in mind that you are working with 230 volts, and this can have serious consequences if you make an error.
That includes personal injury.
So really, take care !
Having said that, i just looked up that relay in there.
It is a jzc-22f-s-a, and you'll find the footprint of that relay in that link.
Based on that and your pictures, i did a little editing of one of those pics.
See attached pic.
Cut at the red line, and cut at least 3 mm away from the part you marked in the brown color.
Remove the capacitor (the brown cushion like part between the black, blue and brown wire, the smaller one).
The part left from the red line and your black marked pins are the switch of the relay.
Check again to see there is no connetion left to the 230 volts (either live or neutral and don't think "neutral" means safe) to these black and left from red solder points.
Once you are sure this is really disconnected, you can connect some wires to those points and use that as a contact for whatever you want to do with it.
After soldering, consider plasticspray to cover the soldering points and the just cut copper in order to get some extra protection.
