I. fixed. it.
It only took a full day.
So on the spec of the GBoard there is two jumper settings. In order to program the Atmega328P you have to put the jumpers on the following configuration:
Software UART to SIM900,Hardware UART to Specific
The Gboard manual shows you how to configure this.
I used the Arduino Duemilanove w/ ATmega328 for the board.
Halleluja