Arduino as Capacitive Sensor

the IR LED usually is a bright bright flash...but when i touch the wire, there is a dimmer glow

if you are still using it on pin 13 then move it to a different pin. Pin 13 already has resistor on it which may not be suitable for the LED you are using/have. Make sure you put in a suitable resistor for the LED if you do move it to another pin though.

Mowcius