One of the more incompetent spam messages I have received ...

However things are looking up. I've received a commission:

Here is the excel file of the commission you earned last month. Please analyze
the attachment to confirm the amount.

(Note the .zip file attachment).

Hi,
Commission! ! ! !
How many spam messages do you have to receive a week to earn commission?

Tom... :slight_smile:

I get a lot, but so far the commission has only been promises, promises.

Another one with a .doc attachment:

Thank you for placing the order (G856633) from 14-Aug.-2016. Attached you will see DOC bill for A$ 1482.

Don't they know that trojan-ware comes in .doc attachments? Oh wait, they do.

(Order number and amount changed in case they identified me).

[quote author=Nick Gammon date=1472515035 link=msg=2901711]
Another one with a .doc attachment:

Don't they know that trojan-ware comes in .doc attachments? Oh wait, they do.

(Order number and amount changed in case they identified me).[/quote]
Barricade your doors in case they send in the bailiffs :slight_smile:

Oh so you get commission on the Matchmaking sites?
:slight_smile: :slight_smile: :slight_smile:

Hi,

Please be aware that your NatWest credit card account was overdrawn due to minimum bill for your credit card is due for you online now.

Log in to natwest/creditcard ====================== To view your credit card activities online.

Only individuals who have a credit card with NatWest and who have registered or are registering for this service should proceed beyond this point.For the security of customers, any unauthorised attempt to access customer credit card information will be monitored, and may be subject to legal action.

I ran out of breath on the first line.

Tom.... :slight_smile:

due to minimum bill for your credit card is due for you online now.

Yep, I like it. :slight_smile:

Hi,
This one slipped by the spam checker.

Good Day,

Please quote as per attached and kindly advise us, always, whether the product are original or
OEM because we need 1 x 40ft.

PLS ALWAYS CHECK REMARKS INSIDE THE ATTACHMENT.

Kindly revert latest by TODAY.
Waiting for your prompt reply

Best regards
Nancy
Sales Admin
MAGNETROL INTERNATIONAL NV

,What gave it away was the first line
"whether the product are original or OEM because we need 1 x 40ft. "

The attached order was 7z, we only accept orders via fax, or pdf.
We don't sell a product that is 40ft long.
And when you look at the details of the email, it wasn't even addressed to my mailbox.
Even though the company exists I'm not opening the .7z.

Tom.... :o

From "PayPal":

All you need to do is click the button below (it only takes a few seconds). You be asked to log in to your account – we're simply verifying ownership of this account.

"You be asked to log in to your account"?

You be needing to learn grammar. :wink:

"(it only takes a few seconds)"

Yep, clicking a button is usually quick.

[quote author=Nick Gammon date=1472795984 link=msg=2906025]
"(it only takes a few seconds)"[/quote]
That's how quickly your account will be emptied.

To whom it may concern:

I am getting in touch with you regarding the estate of a deceased client with same last name as yours with an investment placed under our banks management 6 years ago. I want you to act as the next of kin to the deposit since you have the same last name as his.

I would appreciate your swift response if this is something you can do.

Regards,

Martin

Just because I have the same surname, I can get the money? Sounds too good to be true! Wait... It is!

Weedpharma

weedpharma:
Just because I have the same surname, I can get the money? Sounds too good to be true! Wait... It is!

Weedpharma

Your surname is Concern?

To whom it may concern:

I am getting in touch with you regarding the estate of a deceased client with same last name as yours ...

That's actually quite funny. Hey, we don't know your name, but we have a client with the same name as yours!

And no reference to a specific bank.

Can't get more generic spam than this.

Weedpharma

Yes, you could make fun of that sort of generic spam:

To whom it may concern,

Guess what! A person1 with the same name as yours2 has died and left you a lot of money! Amazingly, that person1 also lives in the same country as you3, and has the same religion4!
Thankfully they1 bank with the same bank that you do5. Please get back to us because they left you a lot of money and we want to forward it to you6.

  • We don't know if you are male or female so we can't use gender-specific pronouns
  • We don't know your name
  • We don't know where you live
  • We don't know your religion
  • We have no idea what that might be
  • They claim to know a lot about me - why can't they just send me a cheque?

Here's invoice INV00249 for 8,325.27 AUD.

The amount outstanding of 8,325.27 AUD is due on 29 Sep 2016.

View your bill: ..........link removed.........

If you have any questions, please let us know.

Thanks,
Sigma Pharmaceuticals Limited

Must be for my happy pills.

Weedpharma

Hi,
I've had two spams now that use legitimate company names and adresses, the click on here ofcourse is not kosher.

I googled one of the companies and loaded their home page, and a splash frame popped up, it was a notification that they knew of the scam and that any inquiries should be made to them by phone.

Tom.... :slight_smile:

THE MINISTRY OF JUSTICE
FEDERAL BENIN REPUBLIC

FINANCIAL SETTLEMENT AND RESOLUTION CENTER

To: beneficiary,

You are by this email notified that your over due funds which you were entitled to but due to corruption and unnecessary fee demands from corrupt government and bank officials you are yet to receive your funds after it was reported that you have paid over US$15,000.00

The new government of Benin Republic ably led by an incorruptible and honest President Patrice Talon. He instructed the Justice Ministry to investigate and find out the best way to get your compensation of US$8.5 Million paid to you.
After all the thorough investigations and we came to a conclusion that since UBA Bank, Zenith Bank and EcoBank have failed in the past are heavily involved in corruption, we decided that Citibank Afrique will be the bank to oversee the payment this time. Now the Citibank Afrique will produce a Debit/Credit Card which will be mailed to you which you can draw a maximum of US$75,000.00 daily.

With this notice, you are hereby advised to reconfirm your data so that the ban can proceed to loading your US$8.5 Million funds into the Debit/Credit Card.
Reconfirm your data as below:

Your Name in Full:
Telephone no:
Contact Address:
Occupation:
Copy of ID:

As soon as I get your reply with your detail included, I shall proceed to the Citibank Afrique for speedy completion and conclusion of your funds payment.

Thank you.

Barrister Paul Ojo
General Secretary
Ministry of Justice
Benin Republic
Tel: +22998754794

I'm going to get right on it when I get home tonight.....
I now know where that odd $15,000.00 went..

They forgot to ask for your security questions:

  • Mother's maiden name
  • Name of your first pet
  • Favourite teacher
  • Brother's name

The trouble with all these security questions of course, is almost all of them are not exactly a secret.