thanks oliver, i think i'm getting it. very well explained!
the reason i'm connecting the lcd power supply pin to a digital IO of arduino is that i wanted to be able to control when the diplay is powered. i think i read somewehere that (for initialisation) the lcd might expect a pull on the /RESET shortly after it is powered on.
after all this was just for testing purposes.
is there a difference between an I/O port set to HIGH and the 5V out on arduino?
BTW i love the "stay hungry, stay foolish" speech 