Sorry but I'm a girl :-(
We will have no talk like that round here.
you are just as capable as anyone else.
Now what you have to do is to remove all those delays and implement you program as a state machine.
In this way you can make it so it looks like several things are happening at the same time.
have you seen the blink without delay example code?
Try and google for finite state machine.
Basically it all runs on the millis time function. Start off by just having one fade, a sort of fade without delay. On each time out you increase what was your loop counter and write out a new value, then set the values for the next time out.
Get that going first and it will be a lot easier to add more functions.