noob question: connectors

...since it allows to easily cut off the exact number of pins needed.

I do that all the time with the male headers, but not the females.

  1. unless I sand the connector pins before I solder, the bonding with the soldered wires is poor and the wires easily come off again..

I've done that too and I always add heatshrink which helps a bit. And you can get header pins with long pins on both sides for more soldering area. But, those connectors are not designed for direct wire soldering, they are designed to be soldered to a PC board.

[2) the connectors do not seem to be very reliable and I have wasted hours debugging phantom
problems that were ultimately due to some loose contact in one of the connectors.

The only trouble like that I've had is that the male pins sometimes slide part-way out of the housing and then I get poor contact. (If they are soldered to a board, of course that doesn't happen.)

I doesn't make a very good Arduino connector, and I've decided to use aprototyping shield board next time I build an Arduino project... Then, I can solder wires to the board or solder a different connector to the board.

Any suggestions for more hassle-free connector alternatives?

There are all kinds of connectors - Do you have a catalog from an electronic parts supplier? It's usually easier to browse a catalog than a website. I have the Jameco catalog, and unfortunately Digi-Key no no longer prints a catalog. Mouser still prints a catalog.