How to obtain the remote client IP address when using the Ethernet Shield

fxfever:
So is it to be understood,that it is still not possible to use the remoteIP() in official releases on incoming TCP connections

Correct, you need to either modify your Ethernet library(as explained in this thread), install+use EthernetClientEx, or install a library that's already modified for you.

fxfever:
, and somewhere someone is still pondering if it is I good idea to implement it, but no one can tell where it lands?

From the discussion on the attempt to add this function to the stock Ethernet library it seems it was definitely decided against, though I don't understand why. Of course it's been a while so it might be reconsidered if someone brought it up with good reasoning why the previous decision is wrong.

fxfever:
there are ways to implement it yourself, but it was loosely discussed which way was best and that didn't got settled either ?

I use the IPAddress return type because that's how it was done in the official EthernetUDP remoteIP() and is more user friendly but the "pass by reference" method will work fine also.