Look, just keep it simple.
If you are going to use a controller to control appliances, then the controller does it all.
Each appliance plugs in to a relay-controlled outlet (a "powerswitch tail" if you are not totally competent at mains work) controlled entirely by the Arduino and you have keypads wherever needed to control any or all appliances, as well as whatever remote control you want.
If it is properly constructed, the Arduino control system will be at least as reliable as any of the appliances, so there is no need for "backup" ways to switch them.