2x 24pF capacitors to load boot-loader.

i dont want to wait 2 weeks for my stuff to come in with my 20pf capacitors. Can I use a 22 (parallel of 2-12pF caps) that's what I have on me? will I damage anything if i do or will it just not work ?

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It may also work fine without the loading capacitors on the crystal. No harm in trying.

You can use an external oscillator, in place of a 16MHz crystal, while burning the bootloader. See Nick Gammon's breadboard Arduino article.