no matter, i have connected the ICSP pins manually using the male header pin wires.
without the ICSP header the ping tests fails as well. but after connecting the ICSP headers i'm able to ping ethernet device from laptop. but the orignal problem that browser test, and other c# app fail to send any data or should i say arduino program fails to receive any data from external applications.
thanks for helping me and your patience. i really want to make it work with mega. i have completed the program with mega and transmitting data over serial. but now i want to move to ethernet, so i can transfer data over lan and don't have to use serial.