If you are new to the Arduino system (and I assume from your question that you are) then I would recommend NOT trying to make a complete list of parts at this stage. As you learn your ideas are likely to change.
Break your learning into small parts - for example write a program to work with the ultrasonic sensors and another one to work with IR etc. When you can do all of the parts separately it will be time to bring them together.
Is there some particular reason why you want to use IR? If there is, this IR Thread may be useful.
Personally I would use a pair of nRF24L01+ 2.4GHz wireless transceivers for communication. They will be much more versatile than IR. This Simple nRF24L01+ Tutorial may be useful. The second example is a simple way to have 2-way communication and I use it for my model trains.
You may also find some ideas in Planning and Implementing a Program
...R