septillion:
You're right but the only source following circuit I see is from @wvmarle and because he is using a P-channel I think he just messed up and meant to flip the mosfet over the x-axis... So the word "all" is a bit much 
@prologikus, jeezz, yeah, go on and just ask again to another to see if somebody will give you an answer you like more :
If you want something that works, just use replay #20 or if you don't have a general purpose NPN and want to use an opto go for the right one in reply #19 but note G and S are switched by mistake.
And if you want to have something stable / in spec, put 5V back to your Mega 
@INTP, I see no stupidity whatsoever in that... Normal AC dimmer does it as well although in sync with line frequency and phase cutting.
Thanks for the answers, everybody.
I think i'll use the npn circuit as you draw
Also, if it won't work or if the npn get hot, i'll buy a much faster dual photocoupler.
I also search( local shop) for a driver specialy foe high side but all i found is high side drivers using n channel mosfets.
The arduino is perfectly stable :d i give 3.2v via the 3.3v pin, as i said i run it for a lot of time with a lot of code and librarys and i never have a problem because if it
Edit: maybe, my octocouples are not able to give me enought instant(in time) current to the gate of the mosfet, do you know what i mean ?
aarg:
You misunderstand. I'm not saying don't use the internet. That would be insanely stupid. I'm saying go directly to information sources by learning to find them in the heap of junk that spews out of the DIY self help sites. For a simple example, you can download data sheets for MOSFETs and there are many good sites to learn about how they work. Don't scrape the bottom of the barrel for pearls of wisdom.
I only have a few months of experience in electronics and microcontrollers.
I look at electronics video this is the main source of information
Reading about them it's complicated not only because i don't know the language but because it doesn't always match with the practical thing...
This doesn't mean i don't read at all... But this high side switch hurts by brain...
I already fried 2 mosfets 2 npns and 2 drivers trying to do it