Connecting ESP8266 module to control arduino

Hello there,
I have recently opened a less detailed thread about the same problem I am going to show here - So here is a better explantion of my problem. hopefully you will be able to assist.
I am beginner at coding and electrical circuits
The purpose:
Creating a system with an IR led in my house that will remotely control my A/C from my phone while I am on the go. So that my very very hot house will be nicely cooled about 10 minutes before I arrive.
The Stages:
Stage 1:
Creating a system that will learn IR codes from my A/C Remote control and will be able to transmit them later . DONE
Stage 2:
Creating a system that will connect the arduino to my router, and to some sort of web server so that I will be able to control.
The problem:
I bought an ESP8266 module from ebay after doing some reading.
It looks exactly like this:


Notice the Reset button, and the switch PROGRAM -> UART.
(F.y.i - I have not seen a single tutorial of that exact module online)
So I tried connecting it to my arduino -

Opening up the serial monitor while the switch is on PROGRAM mode and pressing the reset button showed this -

And on UART Mode -

I read that I should have seen a normal boot up procedure and being able to send AT commands.
Unfortunately that is not possible.
Your help will be much appreciated!

please bare with me.

You go right ahead and take your clothes off. I'll keep mine on, though.

showed this -

All I see is a big white space...

And on UART Mode -

All I see is a big white space...

noiasca:
if you don't want to program the ESP, you don't need the switch in position program.

if you want that the Arduino speaks to ESP you have to connect RX-TX and TX-RX.

if you have connected the Arduino to the ESP, and the PC to the Arduino USB and see the communication from the ESP ... you have propably connected RX-RX TX-TX and that's wrong.

Will try this one

noiasca didn't tell you everything. if you connect esp to rx/tx of Arduino, you can't use USB for sketch upload or Serial monitor. connect esp for now to other pair of pins and use some software serial library. it is slow but you can debug your sketch.

with AT commands firmware (ESP8266 'official' SDK firmware) you can use WiFiEsp library in your sketch. it is easier then AT commands and api compatible with other arduino networking (Enthernet, WiFi, WiFiLink)

noiasca:
if you don't want to program the ESP, you don't need the switch in position program.

if you want that the Arduino speaks to ESP you have to connect RX-TX and TX-RX.

if you have connected the Arduino to the ESP, and the PC to the Arduino USB and see the communication from the ESP ... you have propably connected RX-RX TX-TX and that's wrong.

before making the esp communicating with the arduino as a standalone i want to configure the esp from my pc, so I connect it TXtoTx and RXtoRX.

Juraj:
noiasca didn't tell you everything. if you connect esp to rx/tx of Arduino, you can't use USB for sketch upload or Serial monitor. connect esp for now to other pair of pins and use some software serial library. it is slow but you can debug your sketch.

with AT commands firmware (ESP8266 'official' SDK firmware) you can use WiFiEsp library in your sketch. it is easier then AT commands and api compatible with other arduino networking (Enthernet, WiFi, WiFiLink)

i tried using that library with the example ScanNetwork and yet it doesn't recognize my module via pins 6 and 7.