Detect presence of 230v - not measure

Can you give me a link to a reed relay with a 240VAC coil?

Well a little goggling is the starting point. Here is one name brand on the first page of search results:
http://www.sourceresearch.com/CategoryLevOne.cfm?CatLevelOne=609&CategoryID=24&CatLevelTwo=275

Size, costs, availability are all things you would have to search out for but I'm sure they can be found.

Also keep in mind any reed relay, even with low voltage DC coils can be adapted by using a small diode bridge and series resistor to convert the 240 VAC to a low voltage current limited DC to operate the relay coil.