Grumpy_Mike:
every one needs a chance to learn the basics of programming.
And that is exactly what we are giving him. Look at what we have told him so far and look at his responses. Now look at the silence. If he can actually articulate what he wants I ( and others ) will be more than happy to help. But his record is not good to date. If it is not lack of language skills then it is great disrespect to us all here trying to help.
Instead of being a catfish (all mouth and no ass) on the problem, just post the code you think you are trying to teach. Just curious if you can actually walk your talk.