Here is the circuit, the problem is one of the nte261 switches on by itself, i disconnected the base pin, and found that there was 1.4v between the base of the transistor and ground, how can this be the base isn't connected to anything, i put an amp meter in line with the 12v to let me know the moment it switches on by itself, for a couple of minutes its fine then all of sudden it starts drawing around 400 mA and i hear the relay switch and the transistor stays on causing the 10ohm resistor and the transistor to get very hot (obviously because its switched on permanently), i tried different transistors and the same happen, of course with the appropriate values... Any help please.
http://discon.ua/products/12977/NE720.pdf
http://pdf.datasheetcatalog.com/datasheet/nte/NTE261.pdf
It would help if you drew the NET261 correctly. It is a Darlington not a simple transistor.
Is it the right way round, that is collector and emitter.
Do not disconnect the base otherwise it will float. A value of 1.4V is to be expected on the base because you have two transistors.
You need a diode across that coil.
Hi, a picture of your project would help too.
The part number you have written for the relay, can you make sure we can see it in the picture too.
What is its coil voltage, the part number you have written is a bit ambiguous when you read the spec sheet.
Hope to help'
Tom..... 
Grumpy_Mike:
It would help if you drew the NET261 correctly. It is a Darlington not a simple transistor.
Is it the right way round, that is collector and emitter.
Do not disconnect the base otherwise it will float. A value of 1.4V is to be expected on the base because you have two transistors.You need a diode across that coil.
hi, yep its connected the right way around, i disconnected the base BECAUSE the transistor was permanently on and to see if it was the pin on the arduino that was high, but the pin was low and the transistor will stay on, but it does it randomly , the circuit will be fine and after a couple of minutes it will switch on...it happened with also with some 2n2222 that i have. Can the relay be at fault, beign a single coil , causing some sort self inductance...
P.s. sorry about the darlington, i know its wrong in the picture, but was kind of in a hurry last night.
TomGeorge:
Hi, a picture of your project would help too.
The part number you have written for the relay, can you make sure we can see it in the picture too.
What is its coil voltage, the part number you have written is a bit ambiguous when you read the spec sheet.Hope to help'
Tom.....
Sorry about that this is exactly the one i have 
as you can see it says 7v thats why im using the 10ohm 5w resistor
Hi, fine, a picture of the project will also help, so we can see how you have layed out the components.
Thanks..
Tom...
Until you have a flyback diode across the relay coil you are probably
just burning out transistors - the diode is a requirement whenever switching
an inductive load.