ChrisTenone:
Or it's opposite.People around me consider me smart. The often tell me so. So often in fact, that I suspect that I am actually retarded, and that some hidden protector has gone ahead of me and told them to say that. Humoring me for some reason ... keep me working for a ridiculously low wage?, or providing an outlet for their cruel humor?, or is it that every lab needs a screamer? ... I dunno.
Whoa. I've got that same feeling. People are amazed at my brilliance but with my low self esteem and literal belief that "if I can do it, anyone can" (a very literal definition of self esteem is feeling like what you do is unique), I take it as being patronized. As if their compliments were of the sort you hand out at the Special Olympics. I have sincerely asked someone I trusted if I'm actually retarded and people are going out of their way to be courteous.
They told me no.
I don't trust them anymore.