Properly decouple Arduino in and output with opto coupler from engine noise

What capacity would be a appropriate?

Its not the capacity but the type. Electrolytic capacitors are good for energy storage but have a lot of inductance and do not react "fast enough" for high frequency spikes.

Note: "fast enough" is not technically correct but communicates the characteristic.

Spikes come from:

  • Ignition
  • Lights going on and off
  • Starting engine (starter + ignition)
  • Shutting engine down

Like I said, your 1µF will likely be fine. Its just not what I would design into a device.