Smallest 3G GPRS WIFI Router, GPS, Bluetooth, on a 0.9'' width PCB?! Feasible??

I'm thinking of making a small computer. that would fit everywhere, that had gps, wifi, 3G, accelerometers, gyroscope, thermometer, barometer, bluetooth, light sensor, microsd socket, 2 LED's (5W white and 0,5W red)! Besides of course 2 18650 batteries, with it's charger! The issue is that i wanted all that in a 2,3cm x 20cm PCB ( 0.9'' x 8'' ), and that is going to be a hassle! But I think it is doable! I've been trying to find arduino based 3g wifi routers but it's been kinda difficult, I'm new to arduino ( 1,5 years ) but i wanted to know if it is doable from you guys!
The idea here is to insert it on the steering tube of a bicycle witch has a little over 1'' inside it. There is a company already that has gps tracking that goes inside the tube, but as i am bikepacking next year for about 6 months i wanted to be secure, and develop this microcomputer so i could be integrated to the world and documenting everything.
My bicycle will have a dynamo hub pumping 550mA at variable voltages ( 6V @ 10mph , 100V @ 50mph ), so i am thinking of using it to pump my system and keep everything hidden from the weather an peoples sight!
Check this video, it illustrates my goal, the tube would only be longer, to fit those 18650 batteries...

Thanks for the help in advance!!I really want to make this happen!

I am also looking for smilar product - smallest PCB that will have at least GPS, WiFi, sensors (motions, light, heart beats, blood pressures, etc)