Now my english is lacking, so I cant give you a good answer. Your post is polite and good, perhaps light even, so should my answer be.
What makes a board an Arduino board? We are not buying an Arduino board, but building our own. Because we put other (our design) components on the board, we dont need the same connectors. I plan to burn the Arduino bootloader in the beginning to get an easy start. So the board will be very close to an Arduino board.
I quess it is hard to make web site for everyone, but sometimes you should say things just like they are. Nick Gammon's answer made things absolutely clear to me. It is hard to make explanations suitable for everyone, but when there is a forum with answers like that everything is fine.