What you pictured is not the same as what I diagrammed for you, and does not make the connections you initially described:
The red wire gives a poweroutput of approx 12 V. When connected to the orange wire, the actuator extends, when connected to the green wire it retracts.
Red should not connect to the motor at all - only to the relay common.
The relay takes care of connecting Red to Orange, or Red to Green.