I followed this guide: https://www.instructables.com/Driving-a-Relay-With-an-Arduino/
but nothing happens. when I connected the LED directly to D2 (with a resistor) it did turn on and off so the Arduino itself isnt the problem. I know very little about electronics so please dumb down your answers
You seem to have put the diode in series with the relay winding instead of across it - that article actually has a sensible schematic, you need to follow it exactly. BTW you should check the pin out of the actual transistor you are using (they do vary). emitter to ground, base via resistor to Arduino pin, collector to relay and diode's anode.
If the diode was wrongly placed there is a finite chance you've blown up your transistor (the diode prevents inductive kick-back).
With all circuit building, build once, check twice! A single mistake can ruin your day.